“How you’ve been GRINCHED”. Part 9. Compassionate and Humble.

Published by Sergey Kiklevich on

Dear reader, this article is Part 9 in the series of 10 articles titled: “How you’ve been GRINCHED and you didn’t even know it”. You can read the previous articles here: Read “Grinched” Part 1, Read “Grinched” Part 2, Read “Grinched” Part 3, Read “Grinched” Part 4, Read “Grinched” Part 5, Read “Grinched” Part 6, Read “Grinched” Part 7, Read “Grinched” Part 8.

As we are approaching the finish line with this series, let’s take a closer look at the last two qualities of the new GRINCH (Compassionate, Humble) personality.

C – Compassionate [definition]: feeling or showing sympathy and concern for others.

Feeling for someone other than yourself, how hard can it be? Maybe not so hard but do we really do that? Distracted by the daily routine in which we are all caught up, we are rarely even present to what’s going on with ourselves. Needless to say, we neglect others around us even more. When was the last time you sat down with someone and listened to what’s really going on with them? I’m not talking about the senseless gossip, “constructive” criticism [only constructive in your own head], empty suggestions and opinions. I’m talking about you genuinely taking your time to figure out how you could help your friend, family member, colleague, business partner, or even a stranger?

If you have been doing that, congratulations! You are a unicorn. That’s fantastic and please keep on doing it. If you haven’t [the other 99% of us], then please consider that showing sympathy and feelings for others does not constitute you being a wimp or showing weakness [this is particularly important to realize for so called alpha personalities]. It rather means that you’re expressing and showing compassion, being the shoulder for someone to lean on. Helping without expectation for anything in return. Listening without judgements, prejudices and preconceived notions. Feeling for the struggles and lifting the spirits with your own source of power and inspiration.

Why would that be important? Very simple. Show compassion and you’ll have the ability to connect with people in a way you’ve never experienced before. Compassion is a bridge to another person’s soul, his/her emotions and feelings. When you carefully walk that bridge and patiently take the necessary steps to cross it, the person on the other end will get a sense of having been gotten, understood, listened to and cared for. As human beings we value that more than anything in the world, we constantly seek that consciously and subconsciously. And when we experience compassion from someone else, it is the most wonderful and profound feeling: being heard, not being alone and knowing that you’re supported. Think about how many times in your daily life you just wish you were simply heard and be listened to. Nothing more, nothing less. So simple yet so hard. Why? Because most of us just want to talk, complain, blame, point a finger, gossip, and express how WE feel. Who cares about others, when no one ever listens to us. Exactly my point. We’ve become so selfish and numb that we forgot that we need to take the first step in crossing that bridge, take initiative and show compassion to others. That’s what makes a real difference. Don’t wait for someone to do what you want to be done to you. Just do it. Lead the way, be compassionate and you will receive back more than you can ever handle. Isn’t it worth a try?

H – Humble [definition]: not having or showing any feelings of superiority, self-assertiveness, or showiness.

This is one of my favorites. How many real life examples do we all know when someone was/is so arrogant, so in your face, so full of themselves, so proud and cocky, so nosy, narcissistic and borderline obnoxious? All that pride and showiness, and for what? To indulge in the temporary [often momentary] feeling of superiority or domination, to be righteous and prove others wrong, show that you’re the boss, humiliate your opponent? Guess what? It’s only a matter of time that such a person will be defeated by someone who is stronger, faster, smarter, bigger, better, more skillful, more powerful, more intelligent, more talented, and the list goes on. And then what? All that talk and pride for nothing. Followed by total humiliation and embarrassment. That just leaves such a bad taste in our mouths about that person for a long time if not forever.

It happens so frequently in sports, entertainment, business, politics, family, really all around us. You know exactly the type of people that I’m talking about it. A few examples include Conor McGregor, Anderson Silva, Ronda Rousey, Kanye West, Hillary Clinton, Mel Gibson, Charlie Sheen, Lindsay Lohan, Justin Bieber, Jordan Belfort, Martin Shkreli, Bernard Madoff, and the list goes on.

So why be like that? Why let yourself get blinded by your own success and greatness? You’ve gotta be and stay HUMBLE. No matter how great you are, if you’re humble, you will attract an army of supporters and believers versus an army of haters and doubters who are waiting to unleash their wrath when you finally misstep, crack, show weakness, make a mistake or fail. If you’re humble, you’ll pay better attention to your surroundings and always find ways for improvement. If you’re humble, your opponents and competitors will respect you more even when they lose. If you’re humble, failure will only be temporary and serve you as a lesson, not a defeat. If you’re humble, no matter how high you’ve climbed, you will always offer a helping hand to the ones behind or below you [and vice versa]. You will surround yourself with those that are better than you because you’re not worried about being the best. Being humble will help you to move through life with ease, win more friends, and influence people. It will give you the ability to relate to and meaningfully connect with people. It will allow you to be heard and listened to. Humble state of mind is what you need if you want to be the best in your field, if you want to win and stay at the top for a while. Eventually you’ll be knocked down from the top. No big deal. Get up, regroup, and go at it again. Stay hungry, stay humble my friend.

Ⓒ 2018, Sergey “The Gambit” Kiklevich, Gambit Solutions Inc.